The Writing Life ... a Constant Spin Cycle! by Valerie-Anne Baglietto

Valerie-Anne Baglietto continues the new series on successfully juggling writing and a busy life (or failing, as the case may be)... 

When I was asked to come up with a blog post about juggling writing with a hectic life, I admit I was daunted. So many other writers have produced amusing, sparkling and informative posts on the subject, I wasn’t sure what more I could add. So I went away (well, I sat down in my favourite armchair with a coffee) and thought long and hard about it and realised all I could offer was absolute, hand-on-heart, painful honesty. Which might make me unpopular, but then I do suffer from foot-in-mouth syndrome, so I hope I’ll be let off.

I’ve been writing professionally for around twenty years - since circumstances led me to give up working as a graphic designer - earning enough from writing to be able to sustain my handbag habit. I’ve mutated from a single twenty-something living with my parents into a menopausal* housewife and mum of three (*not quite there yet, but it covers a lot of excuses for my general behaviour). I appreciate I’ve been lucky. Without a Day Job outside the home, I’ve had time to write indulgently for hours on end, happy and free from guilt, right?

Guilt… 

The arch nemesis in a writer’s life. Well, in mine, at least. And it’s a two-edged sword. Firstly, regret for those times I’m so obsessed with my story and my characters that I can’t focus on my family – an uncomfortable nagging feeling that I’m failing them somehow. Secondly, guilt that I ought to be writing when I’m busy keeping the household functioning as it should.

I don’t know if this all stems from the post natal depression that blanketed me when my eldest was born. I was working to contractual deadlines back then. It all got too much, but even with the attached remorse that my baby was growing up fast and I couldn’t savour it, writing became my therapy. I managed four novels – straightforward romcoms – before I had my third child. I allowed motherhood to take over my life completely at that point because a) post natal depression hit again and I felt swamped, b) I was drained of ideas I felt passionate about, and c) my publishers didn’t want such large gaps between books.

Writing v. Motherhood

A couple of years on... 

I began to experiment with children’s stories. To cut a long story short, they evolved into contemporary adult fairy tales, and suddenly, blissfully, my passion for writing was reignited. So inevitably the guilt returned. The guilt that probably haunts every working parent who wants to work/needs to work/strives to find that perfect but ever-shifting balance between career and family.

The solution was simple if I wanted to write professionally without turning into an emotional wreck. I had to work for myself. I had to become an Indie. My own deadlines, my own rules, my own failures and successes, but with some much-needed help along the way. My first adult fairy tale Once Upon A Winter reached #1 in both the Fairy Tale and Contemporary Fantasy Charts on Amazon UK. I was elated, but I wasn’t complacent. Every Novelistas Ink member will tell you, it’s an uphill struggle, the proverbial treadmill. Achieving success can be easy in comparison to sustaining it.

Do you recognise yourself in any of this?

If it helps to know that you’re not alone and the writing life is *cliché alert* a journey not a destination, then I’m glad and relieved. I would have liked to produce a list of useful tips, as the other Novelistas will so eloquently do, but I failed miserably. There’s enough pressure out there for writers without putting more on ourselves. There isn’t one single approach to how we juggle work and life, because we’re all different. So this is me. And if it’s a little bit like you, then it’s nice to know we share a few traits.

Take NaNoWriMo, for instance... 

I just can’t do it. I once wrote 90k in six weeks, but that was another incarnation of my writing self, long before I had real commitments. I was up till three or four a.m., in Deep Writing Mode. Caffeinated. Hyper. Driven. Consumed. These days, the thought of trying to write so much in so little time turns me off. I’m not a bash-out-a-first-draft-fast person any more. I edit as I go along, so by the time I get to the end it’s more of a second draft. At this time of year, though, it’s easy to feel like an alien if you didn't take part in the NaNoWriMo challenge. For a novice writer, you might feel there’s something wrong with you if you didn't, or if you tried and failed, or if you just didn't fancy it. But there’s nothing wrong with you. Some people thrive and others falter; if you’re in the latter group, whatever you do, don’t get discouraged. Quite probably, it just wasn’t for you. It worries me a little that potentially good writers might feel inadequate if they don’t complete the task. It’s OK to take part, just as it’s OK to abstain.

If only...

I’m also not a big fan of the school of thought that dictates a writer can only call themselves a writer if they force themselves to produce something every day, whether it’s good or bad. I get depressed doing that, although I concede it’s probably useful if you’re working to a tight time-frame. But I can’t rest until I shape my words into something I’m proud of, and quite often there’s no space for such crazy perfection in every single busy day. I can’t stay hunched over my laptop till one o’clock regularly without something suffering; my health, usually. Anyway, the ‘writing muscle’ isn’t something you can only exercise while sitting at your desk. It’s constantly at work; the heartbeat of your subconscious, pumping ideas through your head, absorbing new ones from every experience. It can be incredibly liberating to remember that. A writer’s mind is never off duty, even if it feels as if it is. How can it be, when even your dreams at night can spew up ideas?

Then there are times in my life when I need to ruthlessly detach my mind from my WIP for an extended period, and I don’t allow myself to go near the world of the story except to jot down random notes in longhand. If I don’t maintain such a degree of separation I can’t function (to my satisfaction) doing whatever else life demands of me. This year, for example, I hardly wrote anything for weeks while I tried to get my house in order in preparation for some building work. Junk and memories accumulate, and I’m something of a hoarder; it’s difficult for me to let go. I knew that if I allowed myself to go near my story, I would weaken to the temptation, and never tackle the hard stuff reality was demanding of me.

On a smaller scale, and more frequently, it’s the same with family life; those days when I can’t succumb to my creative self because subsequently I’d be a crappy wife and mum. Some people can juggle lots of balls brilliantly, sadly I’m not one of them. I’m in awe of those who can, but I’m just not organised enough. Admittedly I’ve got the luxury of setting my own deadlines, but it’s worrying to think that many writers can’t just switch off when they might need to.

So, to recap - the message I’m trying to convey is that you have to find what suits YOU. 

Experiment.

Be flexible.

Relax.

Don’t get stressed over other writers’ habits; although by all means read about them, take advice, share tips.

In the end, though, you have to work to develop your own pattern, because there isn’t a right or a wrong method. And habits will be different at various points in your career. For instance, one day I wouldn’t mind working with a traditional publisher again (big or small), at least partially, but at the moment I need to be flexible enough to drop everything if my young family needs me.

So, finally (yes, this is the last paragraph, yay!) if you’ve read this far, thank you, and please remember one thing even if you forget everything else about this post – as writers we’re ALL mad and sane, each in our own wonderful, unique way. Let’s celebrate our differences, admit to them, learn from them and ultimately grow to respect them.

Valerie-Anne's latest release is the full-length novel FOUR SIDES TO EVERY STORY.

Mystery and magic in the sleepy Cheshire village of Fools Castle, where a lively young fairy-godmother who normally gets things very, very right, suddenly starts getting them disastrously wrong.

A modern, grown-up fairy tale perfect for fans of Sarah Addison Allen and Cecelia Ahern.

Amazon US - view here
Amazon UK - view here

www.valerie-annebaglietto.com
Twitter: @VABaglietto
Facebook: Valerie-Anne Baglietto Author

How I Became a Bestseller on Kindle by Juliet Greenwood

When I heard, several weeks ago, that We That are Left was going to be a 99p Kindle Daily Deal, I never imagined for one moment that it would get into the top 100, let alone to the dizzy heights of number #4 in the Kindle store.

We That are Left

At first I told myself there was nothing I could do to prepare. I couldn’t tell anyone until the day itself, and it was just one day. I’m with a small press, the incomparable Honno Press, and I’m not a big name. Besides, like most writers, trying to balance the day job, writing, editing and promotion (plus a life) means that choices have to be made.

But no one ever got anywhere by looking a gift horse in the mouth. So I took the risk, put everything else on the back burner for a couple of weeks, and went for it. I’m so glad I did.

Preparation

Juliet Greenwood

I couldn’t publicise the Daily Deal in advance, so I focussed on upping my profile. I increased my number of blog posts during those weeks, both on my own blog and on that of the wonderful and supportive Novelistas Ink, and publicised them as much as I could on Facebook and Twitter. Twitter is an amazingly supportive place. I made a real effort to use it more efficiently, following people back, tweeting blog posts, and retweeting publicity. Along the way, I grew my numbers of followers and learnt so much about really interacting, instead of just popping in now and again – plus I met some great people and made new friends along the way!

The day itself

I had decided to set aside the whole day to focus on networking and publicity. Which was just as well, as it turned out, because apart from a short dog walk and a few cups of tea in the sun, it was nonstop all day. I put a blog post publicising the deal at around 6.30am, and hit the social networks. It’s no good just shouting ‘buy me!’, so much of the time was the usual tweeting of information and other people’s blogs, and lots of retweeting, interspersed with a quick wave.

#2 in Sagas (Amazon UK)

It was all quite sedate for a while. I didn’t realise (until fellow Novelista Louise Marley told me) that it takes a few hours for Amazon’s figures to show, and what I was actually looking at were sales figures from several hours before. It was great being in the top 500, and definitely higher than I had ever been. There was just a small niggle that was thinking of all that work I’d put in over the past weeks, but I told myself to be philosophical. I was nervously looking at the figures, holding my breath and taking screen shots (work out how to do them before the day!) as a record.

Just before lunchtime I found one of my screenshots was blurred and dived back in without thinking. And there it was. We That Are Left had jumped to #61 in the Kindle store. Top 100. (Luckily I have very understanding neighbours, who nod sagely at the odd wild squeal and don’t call the men in white coats.) That’s when I knew all that work had paid off, and from that point on, until I finally collapsed at midnight when the promotion ended, it was one rollercoaster of a ride, up to number 2 in three saga categories, and number 4 in the overall Kindle store. Still pinching myself.

#4 in the Bestseller Chart (Amazon UK)

What have I learnt? That writers are the most generous and supportive bunch on the planet. That social networking really does work. Facebook and Twitter are amazingly supportive. That all the blog posts I’ve done over the past six months also helped to make the book familiar: I’ve done it myself, remembered a post and a cover of an author I don’t know and thought ‘that sounds interesting’, but done nothing about it until it appears in a charity shop or at 99p! That it is possible to get to #4 in the Amazon charts with a small publisher.

Top Tips:

1. Do your preparation – network, blog, make yourself as visible as can be. Keep on doing it - you never know when the chance might come your way.
2. Support other authors. Not just before you need them, but all the time. We’re all in this together.
3. Love your readers. They are your best advocates, and hopefully feel just as passionately about your book as you do.
4. Set aside the day. It’s a promotional opportunity, make the most of it. It’s only one day. The sun will be there tomorrow.
5. Be prepared for things to happen both slowly and very fast.
6. Take screen shots each time there’s a change, it might be your only chance! I made a folder on my desktop, so I could label each one and shove it in there out of the way until I had time to sort them out.
7. Share your excitement. I loved sharing the journey with my Twitter and Facebook friends, it was part of the blast, and it definitely helped to spread the buzz.
8. Forget about healthy eating, head for the chocolate. I was a nervous wreck by lunchtime, in need of the hard stuff (i.e. sugar).
9. Write the best book you can, straight from the heart. Listen to what your editor tells you, however much you want to sulk. She’s right. And if you believe passionately in your book, it’s not just about me, me, me, it’s about the book. You’ll fight to the ends of the earth to get your baby out there to take her place in the sun - and believe it or not, that’s catching.
10. Whatever happens, it’s only a day. Who knows what might happen tomorrow? Enjoy!