Friday 6 March 2015

L is for...Loneliness by Annie Burrows



On the first Friday of every month, Novelista Annie Burrows has been sharing a very personal view of what it is like to be a writer.  And is dealing with themes in alphabetical order.  This month, she's reached L...and has chosen to talk about one aspect of working from home that many can find tough.
 
"But hold onto your loneliness and your silence.  They are part of what make you a writer."

I've got this quote pinned up in my study.  I cut it out of The Author magazine some time ago - I think it's by Terence Black.  Whenever I start wondering if I'm in danger of becoming agoraphobic, I read it and take heart.  And remind myself that I'm not abnormally antisocial, no - I'm just a writer.

Because, you see, I could quite easily be a hermit.  (Apart from the growing a beard thing - whenever you see a picture of a hermit it's always a man with a huge bushy beard.  I suppose I could throw away my tweezers...)  For example, when I go to put the bins out on a Friday morning, I sometimes realize that it's the first time I've been outside all week - and I'm not bothered.

I don't even like going out shopping.  The thought of wandering around, browsing has always seemed to me like a huge waste of time.  If I have to go into town, I try and get as many things done as I possibly can while I'm out.  I write a list, get everything done as fast as I can and get home.  And thanks to internet shopping I can have life's necessities, like groceries and books, delivered.  Nor do I have to visit an actual library very often.  I do most of my research online nowadays.

About the only time I really look forward to getting out of the house is to meet up with other writers, to discuss...yes, you've guessed it, writing.  It's only when I'm in the company of other writers that I don't feel odd.  They totally get that I have several stories drifting through my head at any one time, and that I would rather spend my day writing down the adventures of my imaginary friends, than going out for coffee with real ones.  I don't have much of a social life, apart from having lunch with other writers, or attending writers conferences.  But I'm not lonely.   
Not at all.
What I am, is a bit of a loner.

I think to be a writer you have to be.  You have to be content with your own company.  Prepared to set your own goals and reach targets nobody else cares about.

And only a writer would completely empathise with Oscar Wilde when he said:  "I'm exhausted.  I spent all morning putting in a comma and all afternoon taking it out."

That's pretty much my life!


 
Annie is currently working on her 21st book for Harlequin Mills & Boon.  Her next release will be in June. 


You can follow Annie on Facebook 

or twitter  @NovelistaAnnie
 
And you can sign up for her newsletter (not that she has very much, according to this article) at her website

12 comments:

  1. We moved to a small town three years ago, and I really liked how friendly the community is...until I realized it was disrupting my writing! I have happily returned to the hermit life, and my work is getting done. I know some writers who are more social than I am, but I am finally at peace with who I am. Sounds like you are, too!

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    1. Some writers do seem to be very social, don't they Nadine? But I'm with you - I need to spend a lot of time in my writing cave - that's just who I am. And I am at peace with that - glad to hear you are too.

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  2. I really get this. One of the reasons I love what I do is that it doesn't involve social contact. I'm so with you on the shopping thing - yuk! I go out for exercise, and that's about it - much of my socialising is done online these days. I don't actually like talking about writing, either; the writers with whom I email a lot don't, either, I don't think. I sometimes think the people who 'talk writing' a lot are more the people who love the whole 'being a writer' thing - I just want 'to write', it's very different!

    Having said that, I met up with several old friends over the weekend, who I knew before I started publishing; I find that are points of connection tend to be either their lives, or the past, now. Because I do something they don't understand. Perhaps I DO need to get out more, but I don't really want to!

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    1. Shopping as exercise! Brilliant way to look at it. I have to confess I do borrow a dog once a week to make me go out for a walk, because it is important to take some exercise. Perhaps if I could view shopping as taking a long walk then I wouldn't mind it taking so much time out of my writing schedule...will have to try it next time I need a trip into town.

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    2. Annie, it so is! I go for my morning constitutional each day apart from the days I do the shopping - because I probably walk as many miles, from shop to shop (I don't drive), and burn as many calories as I do when I go tearing round the park!

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  3. Sorry, I mean *'OUR' points of connection*. Second time this morning - the first was a superfluous apostrophe in a tweet, over which I may flagellate myself later.

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    1. lol! I'm with you on the importance of correct punctuation Terry. I confess I even have to spell check my emails and texts! Apostrophes are important. :)

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  4. Well said. I'm currently bracing myself for going shopping this afternoon but, like you, it will be a quick in and out. I'd MUCH rather be writing, but one has to eat, I suppose.

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    1. Well Annecdotist - that's why I've started doing my big grocery shop online! There are still some things that have to be done in person - like posting parcels and so on, but at least I don't waste my Saturdays in the supermarket any more.

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  5. I'm very much a hermit, until 3.30 when the kids are all home from school, and then I'm just Mad Mum with fairy tales in her head (which my 9yo daughter totally approves of). I will happily stay home all week, too, and never go out. But I do love a good natter about writing at our monthly Novelistas' meetings, with my similarly crazy friends. I admit to being a loner, too, and shy away from the school run, because it means making small-talk and that scares me. But am I ever 'lonely'? Do I miss the buzz of the workplace? NO!!! Never.

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    1. HI Val! Yes - the Novelistas meeting is one of the very few excursions I do look forward to. Unlike some writer's groups, we are all about the writing, rather than the "being a writer" thing that Terry mentioned. And there's always cake.
      See you Friday!

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    2. Ah, I see you 'get' this, Annie!!! :^D

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